Sex & Love 15: Orgasm

Men and women think different about orgasms. And, as usual it is a matrix of many of the loves tumbling over each other, at least if you have any depth at all.

Venus (lust), Eros, (desire), Storge (the one commandment we obey...to "be fruitful and multiply"), Phileo (when you are not at all in the mood but you satisfy your partner) and agape (at times a mystical union which we shall explore later) all come into play from here to there in varying degrees.

But before I unpack some of this, and we will, let's admit that there is a certain ridiculous element to the orgasm.

At least for men. And I can only give a man's perspective and that is all I will do below.

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Women actually look and sound incredibly beautiful as they shudder and moan and cry out in orgasm.

A good man who knows what he is doing can feel it coming about ten minutes out. He let's it linger, he invites, he dances around it...stops...then comes back.

And by this, let's be clear we are talking about the clitoris. A few women occasionally have a vaginal orgasm, but it is rare and may have more to do with the technique of penetration. It's a bit of a mystery and everyone is different.

Both have their rewards. I once gave oral so good the woman had an out of body experience...but she still wanted me to pound her into the sheets later.

When a woman comes there is an exchange that is hard to describe. The best lovers know that all sex is about pleasing the woman you love (at best, or are at least with).

The dipshits never get that. They think it is about them.

Idiots.

But life has it's ironic revenge because while women are their most beautiful in orgasm, we men just look plain stupid.

We look just fine until we suddenly just seize up like Han Solo in the Carbon Freeze chamber and grunt repeatedly like cheap swine.

Then we shrink, roll off, and often sleep.

It's amazing the whole planet has not been driven to be utterly Lesbo.

(No Homo/No Lesbo).

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Venus and Men.

These men live for sexual conquest and orgasm. Then they slink away. They will say and do anything just to hump like dogs. The orgasm..their orgasm, is the sole goal with the finest beotch they can find. It's a Dog humps Dog world.

I hate to get graphic...but these are the same guys who think it is fun to spray their seed in a woman's face, like marking their new territory.

It makes me ashamed to be associated by gender.

She is just fresh meat and her beauty is utterly missed or ignored.

No love. Just dead-end lust. "Luv-yah luv-yah baby...call ya".

Darkness and hollowness surrounds them.

Often money changes hands which seals all I have said above in a hermetically sealed bag.

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In our popular movies and books the moment of climax is spiritual.

Well that runs the gamut.

From humping like dogs to being like gods.

In most cases it is somewhere well in the middle. With one exception (It was 1987 and I was very drunk) I can honestly say I have never been intimate with any woman that I did not love. Sure, some in a more far-reaching way than others...but love was always involved.

Love, respect, care, some actual communion.

There is something very intimate about an orgasm no matter how ridiculous a man looks at that moment.

Some more than others.

The night my daughter was conceived I remember laughing out loud after I came.

I knew life had been created and I loved the woman and the little girl to come nine months later.

It was beautiful and still is.

(Even though she and I are no longer married. Still love is there, and my daughter is amazing.)

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Why did God create the orgasm?

Great question because people assume God is so against sex.

Nope. God loves it. Created it. Made it core. A drive and yet attached to love...all the loves

Attached to lust, desire, freindship, family and grace.

This God is devious. Clever. A subversive.

This is not the God of the Fundamentalists who decry sexual union in almost all forms except for strict procreation and ignore all the biblical and physiological facts to the contrary.

For them it is about power and not any of the loves (except when Jimmy-D gets horny and subjects his inert Christian wife to yet another unwelcome assault. That's just biology.)

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Well their is more beauty and truth available in this grand wide-world than what exists in their dumbed-down and unbiblical philosophy. We can leave them to their own devices and hope they will leave us the hell alone as we search out real love and connection.